Takeaway: In this post, I’ll explain why moving on from mistakes is so challenging, and I’ll offer practical strategies to move forward with confidence.  

Why is it so hard to move on from mistakes?

Moving on from mistakes is difficult for high achievers for many reasons.  Often, high achievers struggle with perfectionism, the belief that they have to do everything “exactly right” in order to avoid a negative outcome.

As a result, making mistakes comes at a very high cost. Not only are they facing the consequences of the mistake itself,  but they are also dealing with the fear that comes from failing to be perfect. 

Mistakes are often connected to feelings of shame or guilt.   Thoughts connected too strong emotions are tough to shake.  

Many high achievers have a fixed mindset. They believe that they are “naturally” good or bad at any task. As a result, making mistakes is very closely tied to their sense of who they are as a person.  ie: “I’m a failure.” “I’ll never be good at this” “I always screw up” 

Perfectionists also tend to over-emphasize mistakes. They believe that if they use mistakes as an opportunity to learn, they’ll never make the same mistake again.  This is great in theory, but in practice, perfectionists often ruminate on errors and fail to see their successes.

Takeaway: Perfectionism and anxiety are often linked because perfectionists hold themselves to unrealistic standards, and use these standards to measure their self-worth. Because perfection is unattainable, people often become anxious and overwhelmed trying and failing to achieve an impossible goal. To break free, perfectionists need to reset their expectations and learn to think differently about self-worth. 

What Is Perfectionism?

Perfectionism occurs when we strive for really high (often unrealistic or unachievable standards), and we base our value and worth on the degree to which we are able to meet those standards.

As a therapist that treats high achieving perfectionists, I often hear my client’s say, 

“I can’t be a perfectionist because I’m constantly making mistakes. I’m nowhere close to being perfect”.

Perfectionism really isn’t about “being perfect”.  

Perfectionism occurs when we strive for really high (often unrealistic and unachievable standards), and we base our value and worth on the degree to which we are able to meet those standards.

If you’ve ever had a panic attack, you’ve likely wondered how to stop an anxiety attack fast.

Anxiety attacks can be scary. Many of my clients tell me that they are afraid that they are "going crazy" or "losing control".

I’m a therapist for anxiety, and I help clients who struggle with regular panic attacks find their way back to calm again.

In this post, I’ll cover some of the common causes of panic attacks and how to stop anxiety attacks fast.

The sweating, shaking, racing heart and shortness of breath that accompany panic episodes can leave you feeling out of control and drained.

Though these feelings and sensations are uncomfortable, they are symptoms that are typical of panic episodes, and they will pass. Approaching anxiety with fear or dread will only make symptoms worse.

Understanding what a panic attack is will help reduce fear AND give you the keys to stopping your panic attack as quickly as possible.

If you struggle with falling asleep, you’ve likely wondered how to stop overthinking at night.

You lay down in bed after a stressful day. The room is cool and dark. You’re snuggled up under the covers, and you’re waiting to fall asleep and BOOM! Your mind is off to the races.

Can you relate?

As an anxiety therapist, I see that my clients have difficulty falling asleep and staying asleep.

They often report that they can’t get their minds to shut down after they get into bed. They run through their schedules, plan their to-do list, and think about all of the problems that are waiting for them tomorrow morning.

In this post, I’ll cover five strategies to help you stop overthinking at night and get the rest you’ve been looking for.